Saturday, November 26, 2011

Day One-Hundred-Eighty-Three, Alabama!

I didn't get anything to eat today.  Oh, I had a small hunk of bread.  And even less cheese.  I do not think it amounted to five hundred calories.  I burned ten or twelve times that much.  The discrepancy is making me cross.

Or maybe it's the threat, no the promise of rain.  Or maybe it was the headwinds.  Or the dark grey skies or maybe my one bad toe.  Or maybe it was the county sheriff who locked me in the back of her car.

"You are not under arrest!"  It rather felt like I was.  "It is for your safety as well as mine!"  Let's examine that.

I wasn't concerning myself with her safety.  I figured she could look after herself.  They must learn 'em jiujutsu or something and she did after all have a gun.  Certainly she faced no threat from me.  I do have the strength of ten men.  But I am harmless.  I'm a puppy dog.  The worst I'd do is drool on her pillow.

So it had to be my safety she was concerned about.  I wish cops would speak their minds.  Next time just say, "Get in the car or I'll shoot you," and spare me the condescending bullshit.

This time somebody phoned me in.  They figured I was casing houses.  With a forty-pound backpack and a glow-in-the-dark hat.  Among burglers traffic safety yellow is this season's new black.

So any idiot can make any claim and they are allowed to detain me.  Never mind how asinine.  Let's give it a try. 

Hey, Sheriff!  I saw one of your deppities buggerin' a goat.  Form a friggin' task force.

An hour later I crossed the state line.  And was immediately stopped by the Alabama State Patrol.

"Whatcha doing?"  Fair question.

"Walking Across America."  Good answer.

"Oh, how interesting!  Be careful out there.  Have a nice day!"  Case closed.

Now that's how you run an investigation.  Cheers to the Alabama guy.  Polite, reasonable, just doing his job, trying to keep everyone safe.  I don't mind paying taxes for that.  Good man.  We need more like him.

I meant to eat in Matherville.  There was nobody home.  And so began this experiment of starving myself half to death.  One thing is confirmed, I do need food.  I thought I was just being greedy.  But without it my mucles are sore and I am just a little light-headed.  And exhausted, as a matter of fact.  I can barely move.

I pulled up three miles from Bolinger, Alabama where I intend to have my breakfast.  Getting there might be a struggle but I think I'll be OK.  I intend to get plenty of sleep.  Goodnight.  Love James.

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